Technology often gets a bad rap, especially with how it can interfere with connection and quality time. I personally studied the impact of technology use on romantic couple relationships for my master’s project in 2021 and 2022. While many couples noted the ways their phones and other technology impacted their relationship negatively, there were just as many who shared how media use keeps them connected and strengthens their relationship.
Related: The Impact of Technology Use on Romantic Couple Relationships
One of the most mentioned technology-based tools couples use to increase relationship satisfaction is some sort of app on their phones or other devices. Some were general calendaring apps or shared to-do lists that keep them on the same page. Many were apps created specifically with couples in long-term committed relationships in mind. These apps provide features that help married couples discover new things about each other, have fun outside of the business side of life, and prompt regular, meaningful connections.
Related: Four Boundaries to Set to Save Your Marriage from Your Phone
In this post, you’ll find three different types of apps for couples! First, there are general apps for married couples to use that help create and maintain a personal connection every day. You’ll find apps that are focused on creating more romance and physical intimacy in your marriage. And I included a few apps that aren’t relationship-focused but can help couples manage the logistics of life together.
John and Julie Gottman are leading researchers in the marriage and family relationship field. Anything with their name on it is guaranteed to buoy up and strengthen your relationship. I have this app on my phone and love the great resource that it is. It’s a fun and colorful app that helps you create love maps in your marriage using questions, statements, and ideas for improving your relationship. Click here to download the free Card Decks app.
Related: The Best Conversation Starters for Couples
The Spark’d app is relatively new, but released by a well-known marriage company, Date Your Spouse (formerly The Dating Divas). Date Your Spouse is run by Dan Purcell, who has other well-loved apps in the relationship-strengthening area. This app has it all! You’ll find intentional questions and prompts to help you connect in just a few minutes each day. There is a date idea bank AND a date night concierge to help you plan your dates. It also includes fun couples games and memory and photo books. Click here to try Spark’d for free!
The Paired App was created with busy couples in mind, and it’s perfect for couples in every season of life. You’ll find prompts that will help you connect in just five minutes each day! Sharing the mental load and deepening your connection will feel fun, rather than something that’s a dreaded chore. Keeping your relationship strong takes effort, but it doesn’t have to feel like “work”. Click here to try the Paired App!
The Five Love Languages team created an app to help you intentionally share and receive love in your marriage! It uses your answers to the Love Languages quiz to nudge you and your partner to connect throughout the day. You’ll learn to turn the things that fill each other’s tanks into habits, leading to deeper connection and more relationship satisfaction. Click here to check out the Love Nudge app!
Related: Using the Love Languages Better in Your Marriage
Within the Card Decks App, there are two different pieces that are perfect for couples looking to spice things up in their marriage. The first one is the Sex Questions card deck that allows you to discuss your personal boundaries, interests, and fantasies when it comes to intimacy. The other is the “Salsa” decks with intimate activities and suggestions divided up into mild, medium, or hot. You pick your level of comfort and use the ideas to bring you closer together with your physical intimacy. Download this app, it’s a fantastic one!!
Related: 11 Ways to Pull Your Marriage Out of an Intimacy Rut
The Intimately Us app is one that every couple will love! One of the best features of the app is the bedroom games, plural. Including fun and unique ones like Battlestrip, Connect 4-Play, and Sexy Twister. You’ll find resources and educational content from relationship and intimacy experts to help you truly deepen the romantic connection you share. Use the conversation starters, dream together, create lists, and discover things you’re both interested in trying when it comes to intimacy. Click here to try Intimately Us!
Related: How Often Should Married Couples Be Having Sex?
The Ultimate Intimacy app was created by a married couple who found themselves in an intimate rut after years of marriage. You’ll find new position ideas, bedroom games, conversation starters, and product and resource recommendations to deepen your connection in the bedroom. This app is clean and friendly for all marriages. Click here to try the Ultimate Intimacy App.
Related: Scheduling Sex in Your Marriage – Common Misconceptions
If you struggle with initiating and communicating that you’re up for fun, this app is for you! Any time one of you is in the mood, you tap the app. If the other partner has also tapped the app, within a specific time frame, you’ll both be notified. Otherwise, it will remain a secret between you and the app until the next time you tap. It’s not for everyone, but I can see it being very beneficial for some couples. Click here if this app sounds like something for you!
was created with the goal of helping you keep the romance alive and adding more spice to your relationship. You’ll find hundreds of dares you can send to your spouse, and each dare is worth points. When you send the dare, you can set a timer for when your spouse should complete the dare. The more points you earn, the more steamy the dares that are available to you. Check out the Desire app here!
Related: 28 Ways to Increase the Intimacy in Your Marriage
The Quality Time app isn’t necessarily built for couples, but I think it can benefit your marriage and family relationships. The app was built to help you discover and change your smartphone habits. It keeps track of how often you access different apps on your phone and how long you spend on them. This would be a great app to download and compare use together at the end of each day, then brainstorm ways to release the hold that your smartphone has on you. Be careful not to attack or criticize your spouse during these discussions.
Google Calendar works well for our marriage, with color-coded events for each family member/group of family members (i.e., just the kids, partners, or the entire family). If you’re looking for an app built specifically for sharing tasks, to-do lists, grocery lists, meal plans, etc., I recommend Cozi. It can be used to collaborate as an entire family, or you can share it just as a couple.
I’ve used this app to track my house cleaning for years now, and every time I share any part of it, I get messages asking me about it. I love that it turns cleaning into a game in a fun and visually interesting way. Setup takes a bit because you’re putting together your home and cleaning routines, but after that, the app does the rest! Not only can you put in your routines (i.e., cleaning the toilets every week), you can add one-time tasks as well (i.e., fix the hole behind the door). The part that benefits your marriage is the ability to share task lists, assign chores, and rotate the routine so that everyone is on the same page and things are fair. You can put the entire family in the app, but it’s great for couples as well! Click here to check it out!
Each of these apps for married couples can be a tool to strengthen your connection. But you shouldn’t rely on your phone or these apps to carry your relationship. Shared fun, face-to-face conversation, physical intimacy, and daily interaction are all more important than your phone. Don’t hold all of your conversations through these apps, and don’t rely on them for every aspect of your relationship. Use them as tools to complement the things you are already doing in your marriage!
Do you have an app on your phone that helps you connect better as a couple?