Since our second year of marriage, we’ve been going on overnight dates at least two times a year. We would get away overnight as a couple before we had kids. We’ve continued to go on romantic overnights together since we had kids. And we plan to continue our traditional romantic getaways every year! That time alone together, away from the kids and all of our other life responsibilities has always been a game changer for our marriage. And we’ve recognized its importance since our first time away.
24-48 hour dates are a priority for us and they will always be. Even after the kids have moved out and we’re retired and spend almost every day together. There’s just something about an overnight date that’s different than the dates we go on every weekend. And they’re different from vacations we might take together as well.
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We have a lot of interruptions in our lives, and I’m sure you can relate. Oftentimes we don’t get to have the conversations we want to have when we want to have them, because we have other responsibilities that have to take precedence. When we’re away on an overnight date, we get a considerable amount of time, completely uninterrupted, if we let it be.
Put your phone on do not disturb, with the exception of whoever is tending your kids, in case of an emergency. Set your phones aside so you’re not tempted to browse social media when you have downtime, and focus completely on each other. Whether your date is 12 hours, 24 hours, or even 48 hours, take advantage of that uninterrupted time you have together and don’t bring any potential interruptions with you.
Just like those interruptions, we find that life brings a lot of distractions every single day. We’ve done overnight dates at home in the past, with the kids away at grandma’s, to save a little money. But I find that those distractions don’t allow us to completely connect. There are things to be cleaned, projects to work on, and more things at home. It is too easy to turn to those things when we should be focused on each other.
Being away from home together, even just for a night, can make a world of difference. Your to-do list is nonexistent, you don’t have to think about work or homework assignments, and your kids are taken care of so that responsibility can be put out of your mind. All of those things you have to constantly be thinking about every day can be pushed aside. And you don’t have to worry about them while you’re together on your overnight date.
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All of that uninterrupted, distraction-free time does wonders for our marriage, every time we go on an overnight date. Even if we’re only gone for 12 hours, we come back feeling like our relationship has been rejuvenated and we’re more in love than ever before. It’s like a regular date night taken to the next level, and I crave that connection after it ends.
When you plan your overnight date, leave lots of time for connection. Whatever the two of you love to do together, plan it. Make sure you take time to talk about each other and your relationship. And don’t focus so much on the business side of your life together.
Related: What we Look for in Our Overnight Date Accommodations
I think this is the most important part of any date, whether it’s overnight or not. Don’t forget to have fun together! A date isn’t the time to have your weekly marriage meeting or discuss the pain points in your marriage. (Unless you’ve planned a “budget date” or a “planning date”, then it’s ok.) But I think that overnight dates are a time to reconnect and focus on the core of your relationship. And to leave those other things behind for the day/night.
Look for opportunities to laugh together, learn more about each other, and do the things that you really love to do together. Plan a next experience or adventure that you can go on. Eat your favorite foods, watch your favorite movie, relax, etc.
Related: Plan a Romantic New Year’s Eve Getaway
Plan an overnight date for your marriage, you won’t regret it! Some couples aren’t able to make overnight dates happen as often as they’d like. I suggest making time for one at least once a year, maybe for your anniversary or in addition to your getaway to celebrate another year of marriage. In our current season of life, we are able to get away for a night or two twice a year. Before we had kids, it was about three times a year. When our kids get older and our budget is bigger, we hope to make overnight dates a thing once every quarter. Overnight dates are worth investing in, for the health of your marriage.
