50 Ways to Speak Love Using Physical Touch

Most people score fairly high on physical touch when they take the love language quiz, even if it isn’t their top. Meaningful touch is so important in a marriage, even for those individuals who don’t like a lot of it. When it comes to physical touch as a love language, I think the joke assumption is that the person just wants a lot of sex, but that’s rarely the case. Physical touch goes so much deeper and I hope the ideas in this list show you that. And I hope you get some ideas to help you love your spouse even better.

Related: 7 Things You Need to Know About the Love Languages

What is physical touch?

When your love language is physical touch people tend to think of physical intimacy. But the physical touch love language goes much deeper than that. It can be as simple as running your hand across your spouse’s back as you walk past them. Or as assuming as greeting them with a hug when they get home after being gone. But also it can be the long cuddle sessions that you might think of first. The ideas in the list below should give you a better idea of what physical touch is.

Related: Things to Avoid with Each of The 5 Love Languages

Why physical touch is important in a relationship

Gary Chapman says, “Physical touch can make or break a relationship. It can communicate love or hate”. Your touch can help your spouse calm down in a stressful situation. It can be their safe place in a tumultuous world. And it can excite them and help them feel supported in their accomplishments. But it can also break them down because it’s negative or because you are withholding touch. Whether your spouse’s love language is physical touch or not, it’s an important piece of every relationship.

Related: Why Your Spouse Needs 8 Meaningful Touches a Day

How to Love Someone Whose Love Language is Physical Touch

1. Take a bath together
2. Hold their hand often
3. Always greet them with a kiss
4. Always kiss them goodbye
5. Hug them from behind
6. Sneak a kiss randomly
7. Give them a massage
8. Play with their hair
9. Play footsie
10. Put your hand on their leg when you’re sitting next to each other
11. Cuddle in bed in the morning for a few minutes before getting up
12. Shower together and wash their back with an added massage
13. Slow dance together
14. Initiate sex
15. Sit close to them on the couch or at a restaurant
16. Kiss them passionately
17. Cuddle while you sleep
18. Hold hands while you’re falling asleep
19. Rub their arm while you’re talking
20. Accept their affection and physical touch
21. Rub their back
22. Cuddle while you’re talking
23. Swat their butt while you’re walking past them
24. Hold them when they’re sad
25. Let them be the little spoon
26. Share a long hug
27. Squeeze their hand or rub their thumb when you’re holding hands
28. Find excuses to touch them in a meaningful way throughout the day
29. Rub their back or run your hand across their waist as you’re walking past
30. Book a massage just for them or for the two of you together
31. Take dancing lessons together in the community or use a YouTube tutorial
32. Cuddle them at bedtime to help them fall asleep
33. Surprise them with a “movie kiss”
34. Brush their hair
35. Massage their head
36. Wrap them in a hug with a towel fresh from the dryer as they get out of the shower
37. Kiss them on the forehead
38. Give them a foot or hand massage while you’re watching TV together
39. Sneak kisses when you hit a red light while driving
40. Squeeze their hand during a stressful situation
41. Purchase a couch or beanbag that can become your “cuddle couch” while you watch your shows or read a book together
42. Take some time to recharge at the end of a day when you might feel “touched out” so you have some affection to give to your spouse
43. Don’t let a day go by that you don’t touch your spouse in a meaningful way
44. Set a goal to touch your spouse meaningfully at least eight times each day
45. Verbally express how much you love them while you wrap them up in a hug
46. Give them a shoulder and neck massage while they’re sitting and working at home
47. Hold your spouse’s hand while you pray together
48. Give them your full attention while you’re being intimate, and don’t expect anything in return from them
49. Stop whatever you’re doing to greet them with a hug and a kiss when they come in the door, no matter how long they’ve been gone
50. Ask them how they like to be touched sexually and non-sexually

Related: The Secret to Success with The 5 Love Languages

Printable checklist of Physical Touch Love Language ideas

Click here to download a printable version of this list, checklist-style. If you or your spouse’s love language is physical touch, you can use this to find ways to love each other better. It is written in the first person so your spouse can read and mark things as “I appreciate it when you do these things for me”. The checklist includes a few blank spots you can use to fill in your own preferences or examples of physical touch if they are not already included in the list. Click here to grab checklists for each of the other love languages.