One simple thing you can do to show your spouse that they are a priority to you is to express gratitude in your marriage. By verbally sharing with your spouse the things that you are grateful to them for, you are letting them know that you see them, that you are aware of them, and that you appreciate everything they bring to your life. Does your spouse know you’re grateful for them? Or do they often feel taken for granted?
Related: 20 Things to Thank Your Spouse for Daily
When you ask your spouse for help with something, add some gratitude in. Don’t just say, “I need you to take the garbage out tonight” or “You’re in charge of the dishes tonight”. Instead, say something like, “Would you be willing to help out with the dishes tonight? I would really appreciate it.” Or you could make it a non-request and say, “It helps me out a lot any time you do ____ because ______”. Your spouse will be much more eager to help with things, or excited to do their part in the household when they know their everyday actions are seen and appreciated by you.
I’ve always loved the word “helpmate” in reference to marriage and a spouse. I feel like it provides a great visual for what marriage is really about. A spouse is not there to do all of the things that you don’t want to. They aren’t there to be at your every beck and call. They are there to help you and be a member of your team and support you. Don’t view marriage in a selfish way. Recognize everything that your spouse brings to your marriage and your life. How do they fill in your gaps and vice versa? Don’t demand and expect and assume they’re going to do all of the things for you in life. Be grateful, and look for ways to support and compliment them back.
Think of this kind of like a verbal gratitude journal, specifically for your spouse. You can send a text, write them a note, tell them over the phone, or face to face. This can be done at the end of every day as you reflect on everything that’s been done. Or you can thank them in the moment when you notice things you’re grateful to them for. You could also start your day out by thanking your spouse for a few things from the day before, to start things off on a positive note.
Related: How Often Are You Thanking Your Spouse
As you start to show gratitude to your spouse and appreciate everything they contribute to your life, your outlook on your spouse and your marriage will change. You will start to see more of what you are looking for, which are all of the things your spouse is doing, rather than what they are not. I don’t know about you, but I want to get to the point where I’m saying “thank you” to my husband multiple times a day.