My top love language is acts of service, so the ideas that I have for this love language are plentiful! Just last night, my husband served me in a really simple way, but it made a huge difference to me. I hope this post gives you ideas to serve your spouse in simple ways with great meaning!
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My top love language is acts of service, so the ideas that I have for this love language are plentiful! Just last night, my husband served me in a really simple way, but it made a huge difference to me. I forgot to start our dishwasher before bed the other night, and when I woke up the next morning our power was out, so I couldn’t start it then. Every time I thought about starting it throughout the day, I wasn’t in a place where I could do that (or the power was still out).
When I got home from class and climbed into bed to finish studying, I remembered the dishwasher. I went down to the kitchen and got under the sink to pull out the soap, I realized it was in a different location. And then I looked over at the dishwasher and saw the ‘clean’ light on. My husband had started noticed it was full of dirty dishes and took care of it for me. After he was done with his homework, I made sure to thank him and tell him how much it meant that he did that simple thing. I hope this post gives you ideas to serve your spouse in simple ways with great meaning!
Acts of service are the things you do to benefit your spouse. These acts can be big or small, but they should be done with a smile on your face. In order for your acts of service to speak love to your spouse, you have to be happy to do it. If you are grumbling and moaning and groaning and irritated the entire time you are serving them, then it’s not going to speak love, it might just make them feel guilty. Serving your spouse with a happy heart is key!
Acts of service as a love language mean that you do things you know your spouse would like you to do. It sounds really simple, and honestly, it kind of is. But maybe I just feel that way because it’s my top love language. Acts of service require you to put in some thought, time, effort, and energy. As I mentioned above, the key to loving your acts of service spouse is to do it with a positive attitude. If you are doing something to serve them, but doing it while grumbling or annoyed, it is not really going to speak love to them.
How to Love Someone Whose Love Language is Acts of Service
Fill the gas tank in their car after you drive it
Take care of dinner after a long day
Complete a household task you know they’ve been planning to do
Wash, dry, and put away the dishes
Ask them to pick one or two things off their to-do list for you to complete or help them with one day
Scrape the snow off their windows and warm up the car for them on a cold morning
Pack their lunch for them before work
Make their coffee in the morning or set the coffee maker to turn on before they wake up
Complete projects off of the “honey-do” list
Clean and wash the inside/outside of their car
Tell them that you’re picking up dinner on the way home from work
Run an errand that they don’t like doing or have been putting off
Order dinner to be delivered for them and the kids on a night you know you’ll be home late
Let them relax while you put the kids to bed
Wash, fold, and hang up all of the laundry
Put their towel in the dryer and bring it to them warm as they finish showering
Mow and clean up the yard
Do household tasks without being asked/reminded
Clean up dinner dishes, put away the leftovers and wipe off the table
Pay attention to the things that irritate them (socks on the floor next to the laundry basket, empty cups around the house) and make an effort to stop those habits
Make a hot breakfast for them to enjoy before they rush out the door in the morning
Make their favorite treat and reserve it all for them to enjoy
Surprise them with a treat or meal at work
Help with one of your spouse’s regular “chores”
Have the car detailed
Hire someone to come deep clean the house, or do the basic cleaning on a regular basis
Tell them that you’ll take on the household chores that they hate
Help with a project they are working on or have been wanting to do
Take the kids to school or pick up carpool
Ask what they need your help with at the beginning of the week or before you start each day
Make the bed
Match up all of their socks
Create a basket with all of their favorite snacks
Ask “what can I do to make your day better today?”
Plan a date, book the babysitter and ask them out
Plan dinner for the week and do the grocery shopping
Ask if they need anything when you get up to go into the other room
Hire someone to mow the lawn when they’ve had a busy week
Organize a drawer that you know feels cluttered to them
Make a note of something that’s run out and pick it up while you’re out
Get up with the kids in the middle of the night or early in the morning
Wash the bedding and put it back on the bed
Have lunch delivered to work or while they’re at home and having a busy day
Make an effort to remember and do the things they asked of you
Help them with meal prep each day or once a week to make dinnertime easier
Clean up after the pet (hair, litter box, backyard piles, etc.)
Take out all of the garbages in the house and clean the cans
Wash the shower curtains and rehang them after they’re clean
Put together the kids’ plates of food so your spouse can sit down to eat first
Put together their plate at dinner
Pick up an area of the house that’s always a mess
Bring them breakfast in bed
Help with something you notice needs done before they ask
Schedule appointments for the kids, your spouse, you, etc.
Polish their dress shoes, iron their shirts, and take their dry cleaning for them
Do something as soon as they ask you instead of waiting for a convenient time for you
Plan random acts of kindness date and serve others in your community or family together
Bring them a snack any time you grab one for yourself
Start their car so it’s warm when they’re ready to leave
Ask if they need something while you’re out running your own errands
Respond to requests in a positive way, rather than acting put off
Do something you always talk about helping with but haven’t yet done
Take on a task that has been stressing them out
Pay the bills and take care of all of the calls they’ve been putting off
Put clothes/shoes/coat away, dishes in the dishwasher and garbage in the garbage can after you’re done rather than leaving them
Appreciate the things they do instead of criticizing the way they do them
Ask them for a list of things they need you to do and prioritize it so you can complete one task, starting with the first, every few days until it’s done
While they are out of town or away for a few hours, enlist the family’s help in completing a big project or task to surprise them with when they get home
Set alarms or reminders in your phone to pop up and remind you of the regular things they’ve asked you to do before they feel the need to remind you because it seems like you’ve forgotten
Thank them in advance for tasks that they do regularly
Printable checklist of Acts of Service Love Language ideas
Click here to download a printable version of this list, checklist-style. If you or your spouse’s love language is acts of service, you can use this to find ways to love each other better. It is written in the first person so your spouse can read and mark things as “I appreciate it when you do these things for me”. The checklist includes a few blank spots you can use to fill in your own preferences or examples of acts of service if they are not already included in the list. Click here to grab checklists for each of the other love languages.
